If It's Meant to Be and How Expectation Ruins the Adventure

If It’s Meant To Be and How Expectation Ruins the Adventure

How many times have you hoped, prayed, wished, or worried, only to hear someone say: If it’s meant to be, it will be? It gets annoying. Right? Well, brace yourself because this post won’t offer you any other advice. Why? Because sometimes, a broken record is what you need to hear, even if you don’t realize it. Sometimes you have to listen to the same advice over and over before the message resonates with your soul and the lesson finally sticks.

So, let’s begin.

Below, are four examples of songs with the same phrase: Meant to be, in either the lyrics or the title. Each provides the same bit of seemingly repetitious advice but for different reasons.

Choose the song that best applies to your life’s current situation and share your thoughts in the comment section below.

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“If it’s meant to be, it’ll be, baby, just let it be…”

In 2017, Bleta Bebe Rexha and country music band Florida Georgia Line released a song titled “Meant to Be” that topped the pop and country music charts for over forty-four consecutive weeks. Today, almost four years later, the same song has almost one-billion views on YouTube and continues to gain popularity.

But why?

Well, I’m sure there are many reasons, but my guess is because it has a catchy hook and because people like to dream.

Like many other popular songs today, “Meant to Be” features lyrics and a video that speaks about relationship problems, breakups, starting over from nothing, and chasing dreams. All the dramatic stuff that people want to hear. The lyrics for this song are repetitious, borderline annoying—so much that when it starts playing, I turn off the radio—but the message and advice remain clear:

Go with the flow, and baby, just let it be.

Bebe seems ready for a leap of faith, starting with a much-needed change of environment. She’s hitchhiking with two garbage bags full of belongings and wearing a pair of bedazzled, wannabe Rockstar boots while singing about her fears.

Then Bebe meets a stranger who drives her to a podunk town, and while there, she begins working as a waitress at a diner. She is resetting her life and beginning to reinvent herself. Her progress seems slow at first, and she looks frustrated, but she never stops dreaming of better days.

So, does she make it? Does she accomplish her goals? We don’t know. But maybe that’s not the point of the song.

Sometimes when we must start over from scratch, we look forward to the little things because every little movement we make in the right direction feels like a tiny victory worth celebrating. Sometimes, the small victories are just as important as the big ones.

“What if this is it, what if it’s meant to be…?”

Country singers Kane Brown and Lauren Alaina sing a song titled “What Ifs” with lyrics that probably resonate well with every worry wart’s romantic soul. The song is extra lovesick, but unlike the last song, it’s not about taking action; it’s about procrastination and worry. It’s about someone being held captive by their fears, wasting time, and not making a decision. 

“What If” is a song that not only offers the listener something positive to look forward to in a relationship but also plenty of reasons to worry.

In the lyrics, the singer addresses many of the concerns people have BEFORE they ever decide to pursue a new relationship, such as falling out of love, breaking up, and then starting over from scratch. All of which are valid concerns to have in a relationship, but not until AFTER there’s a problem.

Again, I might sound like a broken record, but there’s no benefit to worrying about what might happen because excessive worrying only leads to more problems.

Have you heard about the Universal Law of Attraction?

There are millions of “what ifs” that could happen, and some that do, but we shouldn’t let our worries hinder our adventures in life.

Also, we shouldn’t become conditioned by our pasts. We need to try new things and see how everything plays out. Because when we try to control our lives through worry, either one of two things will happen. Either we end up developing unrealistic expectations for the people and situations in our lives, or we waste our time on something that doesn’t end up happening at all.

Go with the flow and let what’s meant to be—be.

“I still believe…some things are just meant to be.”

Now, here’s a little different scenario.

In a song titled “100 in a 55” by the rock band Pop Evil, the beginning lyrics read:

“Turn back on the broken hearted
Some things are just meant to be
I still believe that we got a chance
I still believe that we got a chance to be”

But the lyrics aren’t talking about trying to start a new relationship or rekindle an old romance. In this song, the singer admits his willingness to sacrifice his relationship to pursue his rock-n-roll dreams. He hopes his partner will wait for him, of course, but we can all tell where his heart is just by listening to the rest of the song.

When he sings, “some things are just meant to be,”  he’s talking about making it in the music industry, with or without support from his partner. He’s made his decision, and he chooses to give priority to his career.

This brings me to my next observation.

The singer admits that trying to please his partner and pursue his dreams is stressing him out and that he’s self-medicating with alcohol. He’s running on empty, and all the chaos is eating him alive.

So, what is his solution? Drink more. Go faster. Work harder. But everyone knows that still doesn’t guarantee success. Right?

Listen, I love this song, but the lyrics sound like a coke-head’s anthem and a pot-head’s dream. This guy is self-sabotaging. He’s allowing a substance to dictate how he experiences life, and there’s no balance between his work and play.

But what’s the benefit of him jeopardizing his relationship to pursue his dreams if he can’t stay sober long enough to remember the adventure?

Also, he’s clearly in a relationship that seems one-sided and unsupportive. Yet, somehow, he still seems to think he can prove himself to his partner by achieving some his career goals.

Nope—that’s not how life works.

People change. Circumstances change. And some things never change, even when we think they should.

“I’m starting to see, maybe we’re not meant to be…”

At the beginning of the song “Not Meant to Be” by alternative rock band Theory of a Deadman, the video shows two people fighting, then glass breaks and a hot chick drives away angrily. It’s a perfect rendition of a couples’ fight, but then something beautiful happens. 

“But I’m caught between what you wanted from me
And knowing if I give that to ya I might just disappear…”

Suddenly, the guy grows a pair and realizes that he doesn’t have to change who he is for anybody. He doesn’t have to lose his identity to please the chick and that maybe they’re not meant to be together.

“It’s like one step forward and two steps back
No matter what I do you’re always mad, and I, I can’t change your mind
It’s like trying to turn around on a one-way street
I can’t give you what you want and it’s killing me
And I, I’m starting to see
Maybe we’re not meant to be…”

At first, it seems like he wants to keep the girl because the video starts playing backward. But then, once again, he realizes how much stress the relationship is causing him, and his eyes reopen.

“There’s still time to turn this around
Should we be building this up instead of tearing it down?
But I keep thinking maybe it’s too late…”

So what will he do? Will he continue trying to please her? Will he lose his sense of self-identity and try to morph into the perfect boyfriend that she wants him to be?

We don’t know for sure, but let’s hope he’s learned his lesson.

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